Not good....not good at all

I am not sure if you noticed or not....but this guy hasn't been on a bike for weeks. And the last time I did actually ride....I was heavy...slow...and out of shape.

I have my reasons....(eh hem....excuses) for why I haven't been riding but I am not going to bore you with them...it is pointless.

I will tell you that my stress level has sky rocketed again and I have been seeing symptoms from the ulcer I had. That is awesome. Somewhat self inflicted but not entirely. I cannot control the outside forces that cause the stress...but I can control how I deal with it. How I have been dealing with it.....poorly. 

I have been shoveling in the food in a futile attempt to make myself feel better. And in typical fashion I do feel better while eating, then feel like dirt after stepping on the scale. Circle of life...yada yada.

So I am on the brink of throwing in the towel on the first few races again. I just simply don't have the motivation to get on the bike, let alone get on the bike and race. I am starting to add up the cause of all of this and working on changing it.